“I have a weird, collie-like instinct to herd gamers.”
A self-described “weird kid,” Paige Leitman literally didn’t know what she was in for when she convinced her mom to buy her the red box set of Dungeons & Dragons during the early 80’s. “I thought it was a book about monsters. I was perplexed to find it was a game. None of my girlfriends would play it, so I essentially bullied my younger brother and some of his stinky friends into playing with me.” Little did she suspect that beginning would lead to moderating one of D&D’s largest groups of fans.
Other than taking two years to pursue her masters, she’s been playing and DM-ing non-stop ever since that time. “It was just something I did,” she explained. “I have a weird, collie-like instinct to herd gamers.” In the days of the 3rd edition, she devoted considerable time helping run local meta organizations in Living Greyhawk, a massively shared campaign running from 2000 until 2008 that included thousands of published adventures and tens of thousands of players.
When 3.5 came out, she ran conventions all over the southeast; in Tennessee, Florida, and Georgia. She wrote her first adventure for 4th edition and ran even more conventions. She met her husband, then 5th Ed came out, and they ran even more conventions. They wrote Convention Created Content, custom made adventures unique to a specific convention and part of the shared world of the Adventurers’ League. The “I” had become a “we.” “I say ‘we’ because my husband and I are a team. You don’t get one without the other.”
“A community manager is in the unlovely position of trying to balance out that quiet majority against a few loud voices.”
Those collie-like instincts served her well as she managed one community after another. Her activity in the approximately 130,000-member 5th Edition Dungeons & Dragons group didn’t go unnoticed and she quickly rose in the ranks to become a moderator. Paige drew from the wisdom of the comic and film series Men in Black to guide her hand:
Well, it’s like that line from MiB.
A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it. Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was flat, and fifteen minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you’ll know tomorrow.
I like people.
But you put ’em in groups and they tend to get run over by a small community of really vociferous jerks. A community manager is in the unlovely position of trying to balance out that quiet majority against a few loud voices, so that the community can be a nice place for tolerant people.
For all the insults hurled at her, Paige finds staying on top of the comments the most challenging part of moderation. “It’s often like whistling in a hurricane. You get overwhelmed. Finding good help so that you don’t burn out is the toughest part.” The relatively large staff in the 5th Ed. D&D group helps to provide enough coverage to take a break, regain composure, and, of course, run more games.
“Like, don’t fight with these people. Call us in and let us do our jobs.”
Frustration does build, however. “When someone who is normally a good citizen has a bad day and gets in a nasty fight and you end up having to moderate them – that’s rough,” she told me. “What is SUPER frustrating is when people argue with each other over the very dumbest of things instead of tagging a moderator. Like, don’t fight with these people. Call us in and let us do our jobs.”
The job offers some satisfaction. “The 5E group mods get a fair few private thank yous. ‘I didn’t want to get involved in that last difficult discussion, but I wanted to say thank you for making this place a nice place for new players/women/POC/LGBT+ folks.’ That’s pretty satisfying.”
See Paige’s work in action by joining the Facebook Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition group.
Thank you to Mimsy Dorsey for her help in editing this story.